


All that i am

by Claudia_lexan



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2006-07-20
Updated: 2006-07-20
Packaged: 2019-02-05 14:16:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 389
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12796269
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Claudia_lexan/pseuds/Claudia_lexan
Summary: I let you drive my car today





	All that i am

**Author's Note:**

> Note from Haven, the archivist: This story was originally archived at [Fandom Haven Story Archive (FHSA)](http://fanlore.org/wiki/Fandom_Haven_Story_Archive), was scheduled to shut down at the end of 2016. To preserve the archive, I began working with the OTW to transfer the stories to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in November 2017. If you are this creator and the work hasn't transferred to your AO3 account, please contact me using the e-mail address on [Fandom Haven Story Archive collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/fhsa/profile).

Disclaimers: they are not my characters. They belong to other people.

 

 

I let you drive my car today. Feigning tiredness, I throw you the keys to my beloved car. Threats of violence are not necessary. Brother or not you know what will happen if my car is damaged.

 

I know you want to talk as we drive towards our next hunt. Towards the next thing that may lead us to dad or get us killed. I don’t want a conversation, so I shut my eyes in the pretence of sleep. I can hear the thoughts in your head Sammy. A lot of them are for Jess and dad. Then there is the concern you have for me. Concern is something I do not want or need. Concern for a relative only kills you that much quicker. It is why dad and I work so well together. He values me as a follow hunter he does not care for me. He has no real concern for me. The only person he has ever loved other than mom is you. Me, I am just a secondary thought. I am only there to protect you and dad. I don’t mind being the protector, never have. I just have these moments when I want to be the one who is so well protected.

 

One thought I could hear from you, the one, which I never believed, is the thought of love. You love me, but not as a brother. As a brother, you have no real love for me. No you love me as a partner, as someone you can spend a lifetime with. I guess I never really thought about how you loved me until hearing that particular thought. Thing is Sammy, you love the Dean of four years ago. The Dean who has been the cause of so much death and pain. The dean who has not been so jaded life. The dean you love does not exist; he has not for a while. You have no idea what I am capable of Sammy. You do not know me and the lengths I am willing to go to, just to keep you safe. To protect you from harm. The lengths I have already gone to.

 

You do not love me Sammy. You love Jess, but me, you do not love me.


End file.
